tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3041704694353454719.post8041271862192598224..comments2009-06-06T00:18:31.654-05:00Deborah Johnsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492311940302488311dejohns@sbcglobal.netBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3041704694353454719.post-15372770581383383532009-06-06T00:16:28.809-05:002009-06-06T00:16:28.809-05:00Oh my God! Your post was so... I don&#39;t know... It left me speechless!<br /><br />First of all, I&#39;m sorry for your grandma, I know how it feels to lose someone so dearly loved.<br /><br />Second, I have to congratulate you for what you did, because it was something I could never do. <br /><br />You see, before my grandpa died, he spent almost a year in a very deplorable state, barely living. He was on bed, with a constant nurse by his side, imposibilited to breathe naturally, to eat, to moove, to see (he had a problem on his left eye), and, well, to live.<br /> The first time I saw him in that state, I couldn&#39;t keep my tears from falling, though I knew I had to be strong, for his sake, for my mom&#39;s, for my grandma&#39;s... While I was there, holding his strong hand in mine, seeing his emaciated body, which used to be so strong, as healthy as a horse&#39;s... I had to bite my lip to stop the tears from falling, I knew crying in front of him was more than forbidden. But when I left that room and went to my grandparent&#39;s, which was occupied by my grandma alone those days, I burst into the most sorrowful and horrible tears. The worst thing is that I couldn&#39;t stop them anymore, I just cried and cried in front of my grandma, one of the people I needed to be strongest to. She couldn&#39;t help crying too, and there we stood, hugging each other, crying out hearts out. I think it was so hard for me because I was realising I was losing him, one of the dearest people in my life.<br /> I guess that is why I wasn&#39;t shocked at all the day he passed away (last December 24th, at 2:30 on the evening, believe it or not), because he had already done so for me, the day he wasn&#39;t &quot;alive&quot;, going from place to place, never sitting still, fixing this and that, swimming in the pool or going for a walk, always mooving. I had long ago realised he would die, and I had long ago said good bye to him, I guess, that day, when I first saw him in that state. Also, I was more happy than sad of his, er, departure, because I knew that all that suffering was over, that he and my family got to rest at last.<br /> <br />I tried to be strong on that ocassion, but I guess you were far much stronger than I was. <br /><br />By the way, thank you very much for your prompt, it brought back recollections of one I love so tenderly, one I miss so much, and it made me think about that time, which I hadn&#39;t thought about for so long.Makita Jazzqueenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03945349047459142789noreply@blogger.com